What Women Want...

1/30/2009 09:50:00 AM Posted In , , , Edit This 11 Comments »
First let me apologize for the pause in entries but school has just begun and i am on the grind like nobodies business...had to get my schedule and classes straight. They are all together now so i'm good to go...and great to write lol
Anywayz...

Had an almost deep convo with a few male friends, that will probably never get finished...but it made me want to get into the heads of my blog family!
We were talking about the things that we would want in our mate. I used to have this convo allll the time, i even gave my answer when the blog Real Women, Real Talk posed the question....but i think it has changed since then, which is crazy bc that was not that long ago. I just recently finalized a break up with someone so maybe thats why but i dont know. Life works in weird, off the wall, surprising ways so it may not even be the end to that situation and relationship but as of right now...it did change the things i'd want in a mate. Not so much because of him, but because i'm just seeing things differently and looking through a different pair of eyes....

What i Want in a Man is:
-Someone who makes me laugh even when i dont want to. The only time i dont want that to happen is when i am wanting to be taken seriously because it only angers me when people crack jokes when im genuinely bothered by something.

-A man that knows my moods like his own and responds to them accordingly. For example, i am a spoiled brat...my mood goes two ways with that though. I am either being spoiled and whining a little for some attention, or i'm just being a plain old bitch because well, its part of my attitude. When i am just being a big baby (everyone has their baby moments, dont judge me lol), i want a man who will see that, give me the 5 mins of attention i want, and most likely deserve, and then we both go about our day. If i'm being a bitch, i want a man that will put me in my place without being a dictator or control freak about it. Trust, to me there is nothing sexier than a man that can lay down the law without making me feel like his child or like he owns me. There are ways to do it...i'm just saying what i want tho, i'm not giving up the advice and ways to do it also. In that case, i'd just date and fuck myself lol.

-I want someone who has a rough side to them. No, not like an ax murderer rough side but just someone who has seen both sides of the world and can relate to either one. They can be themselves around the fellas and then STILL be themselves around business professionals bc they hold and can carry both those sides of their personalities.

-I NEED a man who is willing to recieve AND give without it being an issue. I am an extremely giving person and it takes little simple things to make me feel as if that is appreciated. Shit, i'll take hugs, kisses, little silly notes, things being made for me...anything that makes me feel as if i am a valued part of your life because well, if i'm not...then i shouldn't be a part of it.

-COMMUNICATION...i want it, need it, dream about it at night (lol) Ok ok, maybe not the last one but it is key to ANY relationship! I have no problem telling my significant other my whereabouts when they ask or saying who i with because i have nothing to hide. I used to cheat but i dont anymore so whats wrong with answering a few questions here and there. I want a man that doesn't feel like communicating with me is a chore, or some type of "reporting" back to me. Trust, i have no desire to know anyone's every move because that's just crazy. I will ask every once and a while where you are or who you're with but its not to keep tabs, it's only bc well, sometimes i'm just nosey and those are regular ass convo questions, u kno?

-I would like to date someone who completely holds me down, no matter what the circumstances. I dont know about other people because everyone has their own agendas, but i wanted to be married young so that i could have kids young and be able to live my life with my husband for a bit, have our kids and then enjoy the rest of our lives as a family. I just turned 24 and most likely expect to be with someone for at least some years before an engagement or marriage so its not like im rushing to do anything TODAY...i just had a plan in my head...doesnt have to turn out that way, it's just something i thought about and would be happy if it worked out that way. I say all that to say, HOW am i going to call someone my husband who NEVER has my back. I need someone who loves me no matter what anyone else has to say. That will defend me when they KNOW people have the wrong idea or misconception of me and not be afraid to do it. Most ppl dont realize that if you have friends, that are true, genuine friends, they will be there regardless of anything else going on. If they dont like who you are with and befriend you for it, they werent shit to begin with. My friends have had problems with exes...even my family has, but if i felt strongly enough to say i loved them, then i'm going to defend any misconceptions or judgements anyoen has. I've done it in the past and still have the same family and friends...never mattered...i hold my mate down no matter what. Even when i'm mad, i have their back...so i expect the same.


I have alot more things i can get into but they are ALL so detailed and i'm curious to know what my readers want from their mate! Everyone is different and we all want different things so...
What do YOU want????????

The Symbolism of Swallowing

1/19/2009 09:28:00 AM Posted In , , Edit This 7 Comments »
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Can You Hear Me NOW??? GOOOOOD!!

1/15/2009 09:20:00 PM Posted In , Edit This 3 Comments »

disclaimer: i've been told i was falling off with the blog, so i'm gonna try to keep it a bit more consistent. sorry to those who are faithful readers and commenters. i'm back on my shit.


Communication- the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs


i added this definition because it seems like there is a fine line drawn between the sexes about what this word REALLY means. Personally, i'm excellent at communicating when needing to get my point across, when working on a project, when speaking to a boss or co-worker, or any other daily part of my routine where communication is needed...i'm good at it.


For some ODD reason though...i am not so great at communicating with my own man!! Our words get mixed up, signals get crossed, messages get misconstrued...like...i know its not only me so WHAT IS IT ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS THAT MAKES IT SOO DAMN HARD TO TALK TO SOMEONE?


You could be the best of friends with someone and be able to share anything with them, tell them all your personal business and just...be friends...but once a relationship enters the picture, guards go up and barriers are placed on the communication lines.


Its so crazy to me because i feel like as a couple, there should be nothing that you cant communicate with your mate. Relationships bring so many things into play (i.e. jealousy, envy, pride, miscommunication, trust issues, "rules"...like, its so damn crazy.


Females see communication as something positive that can build a relationship and keep it strong. To us, it helps build and gain trust, helps prevent dumb ass issues caused by miscommunication and at the same time, keeps both parties on the same page.

Males, on the other hand, see communication as a way a female is trying to control them. To them its like telling us what they're doing means they are reporting to us. Like its so bad just to say where you're at or what you're doing. Smdh @ that.

I could be wrong about both parties though...so let me know if i am.


I guess my real inquiry is...why does it seem like when you get into a relationship with someone...the communication fucks up?

Sex vs. Fucking vs. Making Love

1/09/2009 11:18:00 AM Posted In , , , Edit This 5 Comments »
yes! another favorite subject of mine...
i'm about to break down MY definitions of the three...
feel free to disagree, i could care less (lol...jk)...
if you do disagree, let me know your definiton(s)

Sex: just plain, simple intercourse. pumping in and out of your partner to reach an orgasm, or to 'cum'. no real emotions, pretty much just the act itself.

Fucking: (innocent smile) to me, this is where all the raw emotion you feel towards your mate comes out. the hair pulling, ass slapping, nasty talking, raunchy, biting, lip sucking, just plain dirty ass sex!!! take note that the word 'sex' is used in the definition because this is a form of sex! this is when no discussion is needed, when you and your partner can just look at each other and start ripping off clothes. no props needed (unless of course its a sex toy), no real words needed (unless they are filthy), and for this type of sex, i think there's more eye contact...not on a lovey dovey level...but more of a "im gonna fuck the shit out of you until you have multiple orgasms that ripple through your body" level :)

Making Love: awwwww...now this is your sweet, romantic sex that you take time out for to please your mate mentally, physically and emotionally all at once (which often times makes it the best type of orgasm for a woman). Props are used in this type of sex such as candles, bubble baths, massage oils, "smell goods", music, etc, etc. often times, this is the sex that brings a woman to tears (sometimes even a guy hehehe) but yeah, this is the type of sex that lets you know you're actually in a serious relationship bc most guys, or even females, dont go all out like this for just anybody.


well, those are MY definitions...what are yours???

and out of all three, i must say, that with my man...i prefer the fucking AND making love. either one can be done at will because there is passion and love that NEVER EVER leaves our relationship.

which of the three do you prefer??

NEW BLOG!!!!!!!!

1/08/2009 08:28:00 PM Edit This 1 Comment »
Yeah so, im excited about my new blog (this is Ms. Simpson btw)...
as much as i loooove writing about relationships and the successes and failures of them...

i NEEDed my own blog!!!

check me out at http://godsgift23.blogspot.com

:)

Tatt, Tatt, Tatted up!

1/08/2009 11:45:00 AM Posted In , Edit This 4 Comments »
the other day i spoke to my homeboy that i havent spoken to in a loooong time. he told me he had a new girl but had ONE biiiig issue with her...this girl has tattoos EVERYWHERE! and not in places which are discreet...but in places where any and EVERY one can see them. this isnt necessarily a big issue to him...but he's worried about the family introductions and going out to fancy places where a gown or something is required...and she'll have all these damn tattoos showing...

mind you, i have five tattoos myself. no one ever knows though unless i show them and the most obvious spot i have one in...is my shoulder (some people may say my lower back but thats usually covered unless at a party. i said that to say, im NOT against tattoos at all...in any way! i do however think it is tacky (no offense to anyone) to have tattoos all over your body, in random places and then go out somewhere classy and try to look like a part of the crowd. if you dont plan on involving evening gowns or anything of that sort to your activities list, then by all means, handle your business.

shit, i was even slightly embarrassed when i was in a wedding and had the tattoo on my shoulder showing :(
thought i stood out like a sore thumb.

but my question really is...would you date someone who had tattoos any and everywhere?? or have you??? did it change any dynamics in your relationship?

what about for the ladies? how do you feel about tattoos? cuz i LOVE bodies covered in them...as long as i can still take you out places without people mistaking you for a rapper lmao

Family Matters...Part 1

1/04/2009 07:19:00 PM Posted In , Edit This 4 Comments »
WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU CANT STAND YOUR PARTNERS FAMILY???

this is an age old situation where you meet the person of ur dreams...fall head over heels in love...become comfortable that you will be with this person for a long-term period....and then

DUMMM DUMMM DUMMMMMMMMMMM

you meet their family, and you HATE them. ok, i wont say hate because that is a very strong word, but you dislike them. they may love you to death and like every single thing about you but there is something about them, or maybe even just one family member, that you just CANNOT bare!!

They could be super ghetto, too uppity, extremely judgemental, really loud, too damn quiet...whatever the reason, something about them makes you uncomfortable and you hate to be aroud them. This personally hasnt happened to me...

wait, let me think..................................................
i may have had a sister or two that i didnt fuck with in the beginning but it all worked out for the best.

Have you ever been in this situation? is there a family of a significant other that you cant stand? why???

Date My Mom

1/03/2009 09:39:00 PM Posted In , , Edit This 3 Comments »

ok ok ok, i've been slacking ALOT but im BAAAAACK!!!
now there has been a topic thats been on my mind for a while now and i want to ask my blog family...

Would you date someone who has kids from a previous relationship??

I personally havent dated anyone who had kids already. Not really for any reason besides the fact that no one i have been interested in has had children already. I have ex's who have kids now but ummm, that has nothing to do with me anymore.

I've heard friends tell me they are involved with a bf/gf that has children, or at least one child and i hear so many mixed opinions about it ALL the time. I'm wondering what its like to be in a relationship with someone with a child.

i also wonder if anyone is in that situation now. how do you deal with it? is it easier said than done? cuz Lord knows i am SO against baby mama drama!!! (or baby daddy drama...we dont discriminate here lol)

i've always felt like if i was in those shoes that i wouldnt know how to feel. to me it would depend on how long they werent with the mother or father of the child. also, how is their relationship now? because some who have kids together feels that makes it ok to still be "body rocking the boots" lmao
BIG BIG ISSUE: i would feel strange about how the child felt about me. The age would make an extreeeeme difference...idk...i wanna know how my readers feel!

let me know people...

Que & Dawn

Que & Dawn

Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie

Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie

Will & Jada Smith

Will & Jada Smith

Beyonce & Jay-Z

Beyonce & Jay-Z