What Women Want...
1/30/2009 09:50:00 AM Posted In figuring yourself out , needs , relationships , wants Edit This 11 Comments »
First let me apologize for the pause in entries but school has just begun and i am on the grind like nobodies business...had to get my schedule and classes straight. They are all together now so i'm good to go...and great to write lol
Anywayz...
Had an almost deep convo with a few male friends, that will probably never get finished...but it made me want to get into the heads of my blog family!
We were talking about the things that we would want in our mate. I used to have this convo allll the time, i even gave my answer when the blog Real Women, Real Talk posed the question....but i think it has changed since then, which is crazy bc that was not that long ago. I just recently finalized a break up with someone so maybe thats why but i dont know. Life works in weird, off the wall, surprising ways so it may not even be the end to that situation and relationship but as of right now...it did change the things i'd want in a mate. Not so much because of him, but because i'm just seeing things differently and looking through a different pair of eyes....
What i Want in a Man is:
-Someone who makes me laugh even when i dont want to. The only time i dont want that to happen is when i am wanting to be taken seriously because it only angers me when people crack jokes when im genuinely bothered by something.
-A man that knows my moods like his own and responds to them accordingly. For example, i am a spoiled brat...my mood goes two ways with that though. I am either being spoiled and whining a little for some attention, or i'm just being a plain old bitch because well, its part of my attitude. When i am just being a big baby (everyone has their baby moments, dont judge me lol), i want a man who will see that, give me the 5 mins of attention i want, and most likely deserve, and then we both go about our day. If i'm being a bitch, i want a man that will put me in my place without being a dictator or control freak about it. Trust, to me there is nothing sexier than a man that can lay down the law without making me feel like his child or like he owns me. There are ways to do it...i'm just saying what i want tho, i'm not giving up the advice and ways to do it also. In that case, i'd just date and fuck myself lol.
-I want someone who has a rough side to them. No, not like an ax murderer rough side but just someone who has seen both sides of the world and can relate to either one. They can be themselves around the fellas and then STILL be themselves around business professionals bc they hold and can carry both those sides of their personalities.
-I NEED a man who is willing to recieve AND give without it being an issue. I am an extremely giving person and it takes little simple things to make me feel as if that is appreciated. Shit, i'll take hugs, kisses, little silly notes, things being made for me...anything that makes me feel as if i am a valued part of your life because well, if i'm not...then i shouldn't be a part of it.
-COMMUNICATION...i want it, need it, dream about it at night (lol) Ok ok, maybe not the last one but it is key to ANY relationship! I have no problem telling my significant other my whereabouts when they ask or saying who i with because i have nothing to hide. I used to cheat but i dont anymore so whats wrong with answering a few questions here and there. I want a man that doesn't feel like communicating with me is a chore, or some type of "reporting" back to me. Trust, i have no desire to know anyone's every move because that's just crazy. I will ask every once and a while where you are or who you're with but its not to keep tabs, it's only bc well, sometimes i'm just nosey and those are regular ass convo questions, u kno?
-I would like to date someone who completely holds me down, no matter what the circumstances. I dont know about other people because everyone has their own agendas, but i wanted to be married young so that i could have kids young and be able to live my life with my husband for a bit, have our kids and then enjoy the rest of our lives as a family. I just turned 24 and most likely expect to be with someone for at least some years before an engagement or marriage so its not like im rushing to do anything TODAY...i just had a plan in my head...doesnt have to turn out that way, it's just something i thought about and would be happy if it worked out that way. I say all that to say, HOW am i going to call someone my husband who NEVER has my back. I need someone who loves me no matter what anyone else has to say. That will defend me when they KNOW people have the wrong idea or misconception of me and not be afraid to do it. Most ppl dont realize that if you have friends, that are true, genuine friends, they will be there regardless of anything else going on. If they dont like who you are with and befriend you for it, they werent shit to begin with. My friends have had problems with exes...even my family has, but if i felt strongly enough to say i loved them, then i'm going to defend any misconceptions or judgements anyoen has. I've done it in the past and still have the same family and friends...never mattered...i hold my mate down no matter what. Even when i'm mad, i have their back...so i expect the same.
I have alot more things i can get into but they are ALL so detailed and i'm curious to know what my readers want from their mate! Everyone is different and we all want different things so...
What do YOU want????????
Anywayz...
Had an almost deep convo with a few male friends, that will probably never get finished...but it made me want to get into the heads of my blog family!
We were talking about the things that we would want in our mate. I used to have this convo allll the time, i even gave my answer when the blog Real Women, Real Talk posed the question....but i think it has changed since then, which is crazy bc that was not that long ago. I just recently finalized a break up with someone so maybe thats why but i dont know. Life works in weird, off the wall, surprising ways so it may not even be the end to that situation and relationship but as of right now...it did change the things i'd want in a mate. Not so much because of him, but because i'm just seeing things differently and looking through a different pair of eyes....
What i Want in a Man is:
-Someone who makes me laugh even when i dont want to. The only time i dont want that to happen is when i am wanting to be taken seriously because it only angers me when people crack jokes when im genuinely bothered by something.
-A man that knows my moods like his own and responds to them accordingly. For example, i am a spoiled brat...my mood goes two ways with that though. I am either being spoiled and whining a little for some attention, or i'm just being a plain old bitch because well, its part of my attitude. When i am just being a big baby (everyone has their baby moments, dont judge me lol), i want a man who will see that, give me the 5 mins of attention i want, and most likely deserve, and then we both go about our day. If i'm being a bitch, i want a man that will put me in my place without being a dictator or control freak about it. Trust, to me there is nothing sexier than a man that can lay down the law without making me feel like his child or like he owns me. There are ways to do it...i'm just saying what i want tho, i'm not giving up the advice and ways to do it also. In that case, i'd just date and fuck myself lol.
-I want someone who has a rough side to them. No, not like an ax murderer rough side but just someone who has seen both sides of the world and can relate to either one. They can be themselves around the fellas and then STILL be themselves around business professionals bc they hold and can carry both those sides of their personalities.
-I NEED a man who is willing to recieve AND give without it being an issue. I am an extremely giving person and it takes little simple things to make me feel as if that is appreciated. Shit, i'll take hugs, kisses, little silly notes, things being made for me...anything that makes me feel as if i am a valued part of your life because well, if i'm not...then i shouldn't be a part of it.
-COMMUNICATION...i want it, need it, dream about it at night (lol) Ok ok, maybe not the last one but it is key to ANY relationship! I have no problem telling my significant other my whereabouts when they ask or saying who i with because i have nothing to hide. I used to cheat but i dont anymore so whats wrong with answering a few questions here and there. I want a man that doesn't feel like communicating with me is a chore, or some type of "reporting" back to me. Trust, i have no desire to know anyone's every move because that's just crazy. I will ask every once and a while where you are or who you're with but its not to keep tabs, it's only bc well, sometimes i'm just nosey and those are regular ass convo questions, u kno?
-I would like to date someone who completely holds me down, no matter what the circumstances. I dont know about other people because everyone has their own agendas, but i wanted to be married young so that i could have kids young and be able to live my life with my husband for a bit, have our kids and then enjoy the rest of our lives as a family. I just turned 24 and most likely expect to be with someone for at least some years before an engagement or marriage so its not like im rushing to do anything TODAY...i just had a plan in my head...doesnt have to turn out that way, it's just something i thought about and would be happy if it worked out that way. I say all that to say, HOW am i going to call someone my husband who NEVER has my back. I need someone who loves me no matter what anyone else has to say. That will defend me when they KNOW people have the wrong idea or misconception of me and not be afraid to do it. Most ppl dont realize that if you have friends, that are true, genuine friends, they will be there regardless of anything else going on. If they dont like who you are with and befriend you for it, they werent shit to begin with. My friends have had problems with exes...even my family has, but if i felt strongly enough to say i loved them, then i'm going to defend any misconceptions or judgements anyoen has. I've done it in the past and still have the same family and friends...never mattered...i hold my mate down no matter what. Even when i'm mad, i have their back...so i expect the same.
I have alot more things i can get into but they are ALL so detailed and i'm curious to know what my readers want from their mate! Everyone is different and we all want different things so...
What do YOU want????????
