The Stigma of First Date Sex...

4/16/2011 11:03:00 AM Posted In , , Edit This 2 Comments »
Let's be's 2011 and the majority of us have indulged in a sex on the first night before. We may not be proud of it or even admit to it, but it has happened. My only question is, does it still have the same stigma it's had in the past? Do people still consider females who have sex the first time they chill with a guy a 'hoe'? And do women still view men that try to have sex after only hanging out once a 'player'?

Now screwing everyone on the first night, that's a little bit of a problem...but is it so wrong to have such a strong physical attraction to someone that you take it a step further after just one date?  I think it's more of a generational thing though.  All of the older people I know make it seem like it's a terrible thing, while people in my generation view it as simply acting on an attraction.

What makes it more than what it is, is the way most women feel after they've had sex with a guy after barely knowing him. They start getting into- what if people find out? Does he think I'm a hoe? Is that all he wanted?  Granted, there are some men that make women feel comfortable enough to have sex with them and then disappear, but some men are just genuinely as attracted to you as you are to them.

It's all about making a conscious decision that it's something you want to do.  If you're doing it with hesitance, or because you just think it's what the other person wants, then maybe you should decide against it because all you will have is regret.  But if it's something that you're doing because you want to, then there is no way that you can regret it afterwards.

It happens everyday, but are people still putting that stigma behind it that it makes you lose value? Or a hoe? Or easy? Or a player?

Do any of my readers have a current, healthy relationship that stemmed from sex on the first night?

Verbal Warfare

4/14/2011 04:38:00 PM Posted In , , Edit This 4 Comments »
Can be read on !

Who Should You Take Advice From About Relationships??

6/07/2010 08:06:00 AM Posted In Edit This 3 Comments »
everyone gives advice right? but does anyone take it anymore? and if you do take advice, is it ever from the right people??

i'm a avid believer in not taking advice from someone who has never been in the situation that i need it for, and doesn't know anyone who has. there are going to be plenty of people that offer their advice and feel it is best...but is it really?

i have a friend that had quite a few relationship issues and part of them stemmed from taking advice from allll the wrong people. if you are someone interested in a relatonship and want to be committed and faithful, would you take advice from a friend that's trying to have sex with anything moving?? i know i wouldn't because how the hell can they help me with my problems? they can't even relate.

when i need advice, i go to the people that i know have been through what i am going through and made it out alive. i don't ask anyone still in the situation because they need the same advice that i need.

another thing people do that they shouldn't is take relationship advice from previous mates that can't let go or people that have expressed interest in them. do you REALLY think that they're going to tell you the right thing to do? or just what you want to hear?

my best advice to people is to take into consideration the advice from people that have always been honest with you no matter how much it hurt. those are the ones that are going to give you the real, honest answers or opinions that you need.


Quick Relationship Question...

6/02/2010 11:53:00 PM Posted In , , Edit This 4 Comments »
I get the whole 'ride or die' concept...but what's the limit of what you are willing to put up with in a relationship?

Having Children Together...a Reason to Stay??

6/02/2010 11:51:00 PM Edit This 5 Comments »
I sat around with some friends and had a relationship convo so that i could figure out some new blog topics.  during that convo it came up that sometimes people feel like their children are a reason to be with someone that they may not necessarily be the person they love, or want to spend their time with.

I happen to be a woman that doesn't have kids yet, so i tried to find a way to view the topic from a different light...from the outside looking in.  i've always heard opinions on both sides of the argument so i can't say that i am biased. it doesn't effect me either way.

i feel that if a couple decides together that they want yo have a child, that some type of love is present between them and they should probably try to work through most issues.  if you are a couple that did not plan on having a child though, and it just was not part of your plan at all, i completely disagree with that child keeping you together.  there are several children that have been raised and grown into wonderful people whose parents werent together. the excuse of staying for the child's sake is no longer why do people feel the need to stay somewhere unhappy just for a child?

i don't agree with that. my parents are not together and havent been since before i can remember and i am just fine.  i honestly feel like people that use children as a martyring system for their relationship really just haven't found another way to admit their mistakes and use the child to hold on to any ounce of "love" that is left.

i am very curious to hear the thoughts of my blog supporters, and even first time visitors.
do you think having a child together is a reason to stay in a relationship, even if you aren't as happy as you could be outside of it?

i want opinions from everyone, even if you don't have children. curious to know what everyone thinks about this...

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